Three weeks ago I had a plan, details lined up in perfect formation, creating a straight path. Except for that one niggling little element that kept barging into my orderliness.
Persistent nudging, a suggestion growing more intrusive by the day. I gave in. I took the steps to explore that little detail and get it out of my mind, once and for all.
Two weeks ago, my plan started growing a few little fissures, cracks in my path. Certainty sliding towards unease.
Last week, that niggling little item defied me and took on a life of its own, scattered my nice linear arrangement. A bomb that cratered my perfect little plan, leaving me to explore an unanticipated road.
And here I sit today, precarious; teetering and scrambling, praying and reaching out. Looking for answers that will balance logic and practical against the visceral emotion of call.
Itching for the comfort and confidence of the control I actually thought I held. Knowing that those C’s are unattainable and that I must trust.
Prayers answered in weather that keeps me housebound, plenty of time for reflection, exploration, maybe even some action.
It’s gonna be a hell of a week.